Fish Out of Water
And now, for a bit of reflection....
I can work really hard, and I can work really fast. Which is good.
The reason I can do this is because I'm perpetually late. Which is bad.
I liked what I shot once I got it shot. Which is good.
It took me forever to get shooting, because I'm crazy indecisive, crazy busy, crazy procrastinating, and crazy. Which is bad.
In the end, I was really pleased with this project. My dead fish image is interesting (and I love the focus). The one with the hose is grainy, but funny. The staircase, self portrait, and the lettuce I could give or take, but in comparison with, say, my eighth grade body of work, they're stellar. Yay improvement!
The biggest problem I had with this project was shooting. When pressed, I can print like nobody's business. But shooting...meh.
I don't know what to shoot. Then I know what to shoot, and I shoot it wrong. Then I know what I want to shoot, even though it's not what I need to shoot, and even though it's underwater in Fiji. Then I start shooting, and I want to rip my hair out, then I love my camera more than life, then I get kicked out of Whole Foods and my relationship with authority figures is turned on its head and I don't know what to shoot.
Rinse and repeat.
It just takes a lot for me to load the camera, walk around a bit, and shoot. I lack momentum. That's something I really ought to fix before AP next year. But it's more than that - it's that I just don't know what to shoot unless I have it planned out perfectly.
With this project, the way I FINALLY got around to shooting was to take the assignment literally. I shot dead fish and fish furniture - they weren't in water. After I walked around Market Street Grill for a bit, taking LITERAL pictures, I moved on to very controlled images - like the lettuce in the McDonald's bag. And finally, I managed to pull myself together a bit and shoot people. I don't like to shoot people. Portraits and I have a love/hate relationship. I do love to look at and shoot beautiful portraits that have something about them that goes deeper than a facebook pic level. But it's hard to get that. And people I can't control. I see the exact expression I want on their face in my head, but I can't describe it. Even if I could, I don't know if they could even do what I asked - "arch your eyebrows to a forty-three degree angle, soften your lower eyelid, and convey years of pent up emotion with your eyes" just won't work. I guess "people photos" are really just a series of compromises, and after a while you get something beautiful.
This journal makes me sound like a psychopath.